Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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