is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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