Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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