Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
