Ketchup is God's man juice
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Randomize
