Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
