I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize