you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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