she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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