Whats the count minus fat chicks?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize