We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Randomize
