Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
