ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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