he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
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