i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
