Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
