If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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