idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
