come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
