break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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