Dual....:-)
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize