end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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