Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
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