Three words: puerto rican gang bang
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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