This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
