If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
ttyl tear gas
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize