i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
