Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
