It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize