wakey wakey hands off snakey
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Randomize