Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Randomize
