Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Randomize
