I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
how do you play pong handcuffed?
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
