The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
