I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize