Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
