I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
