...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
