if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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