Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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