so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
