I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
