Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
porn star boner night. come get it.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
