We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
