Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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