New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Dignity is for republicans.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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