And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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