direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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