you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize