Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Randomize
