The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I CAN MOONWALK!
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
